Saturday, January 24, 2009

REALLY Funny (Worth Reading)

These are two jokes my friend sent me...Dad and I couldn't stop laughing they are absolutely HILARIOUS!

At a computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with the technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving $25.00 cars that got 1,000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Bill's comments, General Motors issued a press release (by Mr. Welch himself) stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason at all, your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road, you would have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally, executing a manoeuver such as a left-turn would cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, and you would have to reinstall the engine.
4. When your car died on the freeway for no reason, you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought 'Car95' or 'CarNT', and then added more seats.
6. Apple would make a car powered by the sun, reliable, five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would run on only five per cent of the roads.
7. Oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would be replaced by a single 'general car default' warning light.
8. New seats would force every-one to have the same size butt.
9. The airbag would say 'Are you sure?' before going off.
10. Occasionally, for no reason, your car would lock you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted the door handle, turned the key, and grabbed the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe set of road maps from Rand-McNally (a subsidiary of GM), even though they neither need them nor want them. Trying to delete this option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish by 50 per cent or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation by the Justice Department.
12. Every time GM introduced a new model, car buyers would have to learn how to drive all over again because none of the controls would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You would press the 'start' button to shut off the engine.

A Spanish teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine."House" for instance, is feminine: "la casa.""Pencil," however, is masculine: "el lapiz."A student asked, "What gender is 'computer'?"Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether "computer" should be a masculine or a feminine noun.Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.
The men's group decided that "computer" should definitely be of the feminine gender ("la computadora") because:
1. No one but their creator understands their internal logic.
2. The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else.
3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and
4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be masculine ("el computador") because:
1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on.
2. They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves.
3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time, the ARE the problem; and
4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model.
The women won.

Thursday, January 15, 2009

More Awesomeness

Here are some other cool videos my friends have been passing around, enjoy!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2gWhX7WDzk&feature=PlayList&p=BF0097A7E6414560&playnext=1&index=19 (This is a Beatle's Medley played by the Canadian Brass, a really cool arrangement played by and awesome quintet)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dMH0bHeiRNg (This is called the Evolution of Dance, it's a comedian, it's hilarious, but it'll probably be even funnier for all you old people who were actually alive when most of these dances were actually popular) :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crTCgkjX9K0 (A really funny Captain Morgan commercial)

Hope y'all enjoy! I'll try to post cool things my friends and I find. :)

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Awesomeness

Hey, my friend sent me this really cool link. It's awesome.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lk5_OSsawz4

Check it out, it's a four part acapella john williams tribute, sung by the same guy by synchronizing abunch of videos. It puts all William's awesome themes together and adds some really funny lyrics! Enjoy! :)

Sunday, January 11, 2009

Jake's New Home

Well, Jake and I are starting to get our rhythm living together. It's been awhile since I had a roommate so it's taken some getting used to. I picked him up last Wednesday in what can only by described as an emotional whirlwind for both of us. My first attempt at getting him into the carrier was traumatic to say the least, not to mention unsuccessful. After we both calmed down abit I tried again and managed to get him in without getting clawed. He was NOT a happy camper. For a cat with such a pathetic meow he sure put up a holler while riding in the carrier. After a couple of accidents, he said they were accidents, that first night Jake has taken to the litter box without a problem. I still tread very carefully first thing in the morning.

So far I don't think I'll need to teach him to fly. When he gets in my bed he stays at the foot and doesn't bother me. He's also extremely curious. He hates closed doors. He's tried opening all the lower cabinets in the kitchen, my bedroom closet, and the spare bedroom which he has decided is his. He was a little clingy and very skittish the first couple of days but he's adjusting. I just can't get him to spend any time outside. He'll got out, roll in the dirt, and come back in. Maybe when he's more comfortable he'll spend more time out. Anyway, we're both doing fine.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

CONGRATULATIONS KYLE!!! OUR NEWEST COLLEGE GRAD!!!

Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Poll

Ok, so I posted a poll to the right. For some reason I cannot edit the text color for the choices. You can edit every other aspect of this blog BUT the polls...go figure. Anyway, if you can squint enough to see it and vote I'd appreciate it! =0)

Monday, January 5, 2009

Hey there. Happy New Year everyone!
Does anyone know how to post a poll on here? I can't figure it out.

Thursday, January 1, 2009

Happy Birthday Travis Reed Rogers!!!
What did you do to celebrate, or should I ask?
Hope you had fun. How cool to be a New Year's Baby.
Love,
Aunt Kay

Happy New Year Everyone!

I hope that everyone's New Year has started on the right foot. A group of teachers went to a casino, which was only for foreigners. I am not sure what the exact law is here, but it is illegal for South Koreans to gamble but it is ok for foreigners. So in order to get in, we had to show our alien registration ID's which I had just received a couple days prior. It was a pretty odd New Years as they don't really seem inclined to celebrate it like we do. 10 seconds before the New Year, they put up a video of downtown Seoul with a count down. We, the teachers, screeched out the count down as the other foreigners, mostly Asians, stared at us as if were crazy. When the time changed, we jumped around kissing each other and wishing each other a happy new year, while the gamblers resumed their card games or slot machines. It was my first time at gambling, and as I am not very good, and didn't want to give the casino beaucoups of money, I only spent $10 at $1 roulette table, after just learning the rules, and didn't have much luck.

The next day we had class again at the usual time. So obviously we were all bright and bushy-taled! Ha, rather we were walking zombies! So, at this point, I think I have caught up on my sleep and this weekend is our ski trip. Almost all 20 of the teachers are going. I have never skiied in my life so it should be a very interesting trip. I am sad Kyle isn't with me to go skiing for the first time together, but we will have to make it up when he gets here by going on another trip!

This week, instead of 6th graders we have 3rd and 4th graders. And I have decided that I love that age. They are so sweet and always up for playing games. It also helps that my homeroom class LOVES me and they always come and hold my hand. They can't speak hardly any English, these adorable little ones, but they are so cute and cuddily, I just want to take them home with me.

So there is my little update. Can't wait to hear more from ya'll!